How "SHE" became an IAS officer Surabhi Gautam TEDxRGPV
in my percentage Good enough to place me on the state and by state merit list. Well, I became a pseudo celebrity of my village. I was in news for quite a week and the newspaper interviewer came to me, and he started to ask me questions, how you did this, you know, this is a great achievement and all. And at last, he has one question. So it'll be what do you want to become when you grow up? You know, what is your career choice? Well, I was not knowing what a career is all I was knowing that okay, I'm good at dancing. So, I can be a dancer, I can be a singer too I can paint also but a career I told him sir, I do not I cannot recall anything, I cannot answer this question to you. He said Come on, you have to answer this you have got a place in merit list. Suddenly, a word flashed in my mind out of nowhere, and I said, I want to be a collector, when he got the headline for the next day, and I was damned.
Next day, the news game collector when this this news change, you know, course of everything for me, after that, everyone was coming to my home with the sweets to my parents, and they were saying that they you know, bottom tip like eco Tiger AG, I was enjoying all that Limelight, but I was not knowing how to be a collector, what a collector is and how important he is for society. Well, I went into 11th I took mathematics and I forgot about all these things. Yeah, I wanted to correct something that was wrong in my village that was wrong with my education, that was wrong with the situation of my village that there was no electricity, there was no proper hospital. So, I wanted those things to be on right place, but through collector or not through it, I was not clear. Well, I passed 12 and I got a big a big column scholarship for securing maximum marks in science history. So again, one more pseudo celebrity status and with all this status, I came to this big city of Bhopal in this very college and took admission for Bachelor of Engineering. This decision of my parents to send me from the village to a big city for higher education was a big decision because I was the first girl from my village to go out and study. So, it was not only I who was studying here it was the whole village along with me, if I will come back the hopes of all other girls the door for all other girls will close automatically. So I had to perform here anyhow. Well, the first day of my college was the worst day of my goal is to be frank because what happened when I ended the call is there was chemistry lab that was going on I entered the class and the man was taking lab she and she asked me okay you go into tight ration tight ration in my village, there was no lab I do not know the meaning of hydration in Hindi. So I was standing there blank again I looked at ma'am she see me go there and pick up the test you first time in like my life I had seen the test you when I I took that and it broke and I was like oh my god what I have done anyhow I was hiding behind something. So that man should not notice me and I passed one hour then the next class Engineering Physics introductions were going on and everyone was standing and fluently asking answering giving their introduction in English and I was freezing in my seat that when my turn will come What am I supposed to do? What will I say I do not know English at all. I am from a Hindi medium school. How will I introduce myself? I was stealing words from everyone's introduction. And anyhow I you know, jotted down the words and gave my introduction. And I thought okay, this has passed. But the server's not patient enough. He asked me one more question he asked me, okay, tell me the definition of potential. Okay, the basic question of physics. I have got a big abdulsalami scholarship for scoring maximum marks in physics
PCM.
But I had to answer this in English. And I cannot frame a sentence a single sentence in English. So I just stood there. And I kept Mum, teacher came to me and he said, I really have you really completed your 12 Have you really passed it? You cannot answer this very basic question of physics. Only I knew how much I love physics. I'm not answering this not because I do not know physics. It is because I do not know English. But this all was going on in my mind. Only I was not able to speak anything. Well, I came back to my room. And I wept. You know, I cried. I just wanted to pack my bag and go back to my village. No more higher education. Nothing is this city is not meant for me.
This college is not meant for me. These people are not meant for me. I call my parents that day. That day. They play the role of Java and the role that Java went played for anumana reminding him all of his great powers that no you can find no you can fly. They They told Give me that okay, you come back. But see you are closing the door of all other girls of your village. So you had to take a big decision. Well I picked the point and I decided to fight and I decided that by the end of this semester, I am going to be fluent in English. Well, I took my engineering books I jotted down all the Spelling's and everything I pasted them on my wall and all my walls white were coloured with the Spelling's and I was always on the revision mode. And it went deep inside my subconscious mind that you know, my dreams also were in English after that, it all the characters beat. And in first semester I taught, I taught not only my college by but I taught the whole university and I got Chancellor's scholarship for that, that day. That day, I had this belief that if you really want want to achieve something, anyhow, you know, you do not have any means because when I wanted to improve my English, I was not able to take coaching and I was not having any English medium friend, so I was totally unarmed. But I do not know how the universe conspired. And I finally was able to give a TED talk even in this platform, when the college passed, and I completed my college when I was 20. And half, so you need 21 years as minimum age for UPC exam. So Meanwhile, I wrote gate exam is through exam Bar Exam, sale exam, mppsc exam. And after six months, I wrote ies exam, and my dear friends, I qualified all of them. Then the first call letter that I got, that was from Bob Atomic Research Centre, Department of atomic energy, Mumbai. So I was very excited. Okay, I'm going to give this highly, you know, touted as the one of the most toughest interview of India. So I was about to appear in that interview, I consulted some of my seniors about how it can be How should I prepare? How should I prepare for it, all I got was negative feedback, see sohrabi in all of our lives, we have never seen anybody qualifying that interview, okay, you want to go to Mumbai for fun and then go, but don't have this expectation that you're going to do anything there. Well, this all this negativity, I appeared in interview. And I was the first scientist to whom I was knowing as a scientist in my life. So I qualified that interview, and I shifted to Mumbai, and I became a nuclear scientist. But I wrote a ies exam in VI and it takes one years for the one year for the results to come. After one year the result came and I was a ir one, not from any IIT, not from any nit, I was from UID.
I was the first lady in India to talk engineering service exam.
And my marks were maximum marks in history of UPC till date. So finally, after becoming a sarkari officer, I did resign from BRC and I joined Indian Railways through engineering service and I went to secundrabad for railways training, I was getting salary, there is no financial problem. You know, I was getting respect from society. So I did not to study anymore. No, no hard work. So all piety was waiting for me. And I was very excited. Okay, life is now going to be a smooth ride. No more hard work, no more sacrifices and all I have done enough.
When I joined railways, and I was thinking to enjoy, I was trying hard to enjoy and be happy, but I was not happy. And I was not knowing what what is wrong with all these things. So I called my mother and I asked her why is it happening with me why I'm not enjoying all this? She She said me happy? Do you remember your 10th class interview? Have you ever read that piece of paper again, that you said you want to be something or you want to do something for your village and all those things? Was this struggle was only for a sarkari job or a good salary? Or was this something for for something else also? Well, I really recall and I read this interview again, and I don't know how many times in my life I've read it and I decided to prepare for civil service examination.
Well, this examination I want to say is one of the toughest exam of in not only India, but offered 11 lakh aspirants appear for this and mostly it takes four or five attempts for them to clear students in Delhi, if you will go there and see they are giving their 24 hours every day and preparing for this exam. And I was doing the job of railways I was deciding to prepare for this exam. I was hardly getting three or four hours from my training to prepare for this exam. I could not take leave in training also. So so the decision was going to be very tough decision for me. But with all those things, I decided to go ahead and I started my preparation. I was mostly On train roaming for trail where railway training so I bought a tab and I downloaded all the things so I started reading online I, I read it, I read in mobile, I read in my tab, and I was mostly on you know, stealing mode I was stealing minutes from us. And sometime I felt frustrated, I felt like giving up. Again, I called my mom, she she was a continuous mentor for me. So I called her I said, see, even after becoming a sarkari officer I have to do again, all these things life is so miserable for me, I was never enjoying when I was a child. And today also when I'm an officer I am not enjoying I'm only doing studies and I don't know where it is going to lead. Am I going to qualify it or not? I'm not sure but still I am against studying studying all the time.
She sent me one thing see you are 23 when I was 23 I had three childs, the youngest of them was 10 months old, I had a family of 30 plus members to whom I had to cook me then I had a job 10 kilometres away from our village to next another village. So, I had to go do that also and then I had allergic skin. So for that I had to visit doctor and I have to cover my body all the time. So I had all these problems, but I never complained. You on the other hand, do not have any social responsibility, family responsibility, all you have is your dream. All you want is to prove for yourself because for others you have already proved this is your task you have to do and you are saying life is difficult at you. You have you need to change your lenses later. That day, I stopped complaining mostly, at least with her and I was totally on a mission mode. All my scar cities I converted them into my luxuries. The more I struggled more strong I became and finally I got all India ranked 50 in this coveted exam Civil Services examination.
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